29556

Joke of the Day

"I'm gonna stand outside a strangers house tonight with a lit candle & tell them it's in remembrance of all the people I killed there."

"What cheese do hunters use to goad a bear out from its cave in the winter? Camenbert"

"What idiot coined the term ex-fiance Instead of near-Mrs Edit: ex fiancee. I'm not as smart as I thought I was.."

"What kind of tea did the American colonists want? Liberty"

"Why do they call it PMS? Because mad cow disease was taken"

"I have to find a new personal trainer. He didn't do squat(s)."

"If batman and catwoman had a kid it would be batcat or the less popular manwoman."

"What is the bank manager's favourite type of football? Fiver side!"

"Old man first world problem I can't use a fleshlight without first using viagara"

"I've considered shaving off my beard But it's starting to grow on me"