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Joke of the Day
"I'm giving up my new year's resolution for lent"
Next Joke
"Jimmy was eating ice cream but dropped it as he crossed the street. Why? He was hit by a bus."
"ME: Mint choc chip ice cream, pls. I got my own cone [places it on counter] EMPLOYEE: This is a traffic cone? ME: You must be new here."
"Trolling my FB friends by commenting ""Looking good ;)"" on solo pics of their husbands"
"What's the internal temperature of a Ton-Ton? Lukewarm."
"Some of the best things in life...are mistakes."
"[interviewer looks up from resume] in the skills, you wrote ""completing sentences? Yes."" wow. you ""'re hired?"" amaz- ""on prime?"" get out."
"What vehicle does Hitler use to fly ? Heil-acopter"
"In Soviet Russia, the government own businesses. In Capitalist America, businesses own the government. *Insert edgy quotes"
"[NSFW] If abortion is a kill..... If abortion is a kill then jerking off is a massacre"