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Joke of the Day

"What would a scandal involving Microsoft be called? Gatesgate."

"I hate it when employees ask to go home sick Diarrhea is a really shitty excuse. And vomiting is always a toss up."

"If your jokes are corny I'm all ears."

"What do you call a cassette single of The Proclaimers' hit ""I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)""? Scotch tape."

"Crap happens Called in sick to work cause I had a stomach ache and felt constipated. Got fired. Couldn't give a crap even if I wanted to."

"Anyone know if Flava Flav survived the weekend's Daylight Savings switchover?"

"My penis Oh, there must be a mistake... ...this post wasn't flagged as long."

"Why did Ellen Pao punch the puppy? Cause shes terrible."

"Do you like discounts? Don't worry at my house, my pants are 100% off"

"Why did Hitler shoot himself? He saw his gas bill!"