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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Justin Bieber and a birth certificate? A birth certificate states the sex."

"why is it so hard just to get your kids to say ""bitch please"" and ""bitch thank you"""

"Sorry about the concussion Steve but it wouldn't be called a ""trust fall"" if it worked every time."

"My kids think all food includes long, dark hairs as standard."

"Why do most chicken coups have 2 doors? Because if they had 4 doors, it'd be considered a chicken sedan!"

"You can never trust someone from Chernobyl. Most of them are two-faced."

"If you can read this please let me know because, it means I blocked the wrong person. I'm still getting used to this Stupid timeline!"

"Why are so many guys mean to their girl friends ? Because of the [central limit theorem](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Central_limit_theorem)."

"Until public restrooms have automatic doors, the automatic sinks, soap and paper towel dispenser will make no sense to me."

"Why are LED's a good investment? Because they always diode."