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Joke of the Day

"Eleven: We're not allowed to wear spaghetti straps at school. The straps must be at least 2 inches wide. Six: Oh yeah, lasagna straps."

"Why did Bill and Ted join Islam? Because they heard it was radical!"

"Q: What lottery did the broom win? A: The sweepstakes."

"Did you hear about the guy who threw a tree at Donald Trump? He missed; I guess you really can't stump the Trump."

"How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb? Seven. One to install the bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years"

"I heard Simon say, ""Turn to the next page."""

"Him: You're not the sharpest tool in the shed, are you darlin? Me: HOW DARE Y... Wait, did you just call me darlin"

"Where do ISIS fighters go to purchase soda and candy? Allahu snackbar!"

"Snowmen don't 69, they 88."

"Friends don't let friends make Harlem Shake' videos..."