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Joke of the Day

"AOL has been hacked. Users have also been asked to check their Atari settings for possible compromise."

"Someone just threw a bottle of Omega 3 tablets at me. I only suffered super fish oil injuries, but I'm lucky I wasn't krilled!"

"Why did the Egyptian spit out his water? Because it came from the Suez."

"I don't want buns of steel. I want buns of cinnamon."

"Why do ducks have webbed feet? To stomp out forest fires. Why do elephants have big flat feet? To stomp out burning ducks."

"Cats always have an expression like they ordered 2 of everything on Amazon with your credit card while you were at work."

"I once dated a girl with a sledgehammer fetish She was pretty *eh* looking, but the sex was smashing!"

"Damn girl, are you a Muse song? Because on the outside you're ablaze and alive, but you're dead inside."

"If I lived in Gotham City I'd always be hinting I was Batman to get freebies. ""I'll get the bat-check. I mean regular check. Bat-thanks."""

"Bono and the Edge walk into a bar... The bartender looks up at them and says ""Oh, not you two again.""."