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Joke of the Day

"What's the definition of a Mistress? Oh, I don't know. Probably something between a Mister and a mattress."

"My lesbian friends just got me a Rolex for my birthday. I think they misunderstood me when I told them ""I wanna watch."""

"How do you titillate an ocelot? .... .... You oscillate its tit a lot"

"What do you call the space between Pamela Anderson's breasts? Silicon Valley."

"What's the best part of being a necrophiliac? In the bedroom, it doesn't take much effort to make your lover's jaw drop."

"A rather bold robber... Broke into the local police department and stole all of their toilets. Cops report that they have nothing to go on."

"I want to hire a Chipotle employee to tuck me in at night."

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the 'P' is silent."

"There once was a man from Peru Whose limerick was three lines too few."

"Why didn't Cupid shoot his arrow at the lawyer's heart? Because even Cupid can't hit a target that small."