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Joke of the Day

"Sir? the table of hot ladies over there wanted to know what song you were drumming on the bar. they said it seemed very fast and impressive."

"There are few things I enjoy more than picking an argument with my girlfriend when she has the hiccups."

"I finally realised why Oscar Pistorius lost his trial Because from a legal point he didn't have a leg to stand on."

"What do you call nuts on the wall? : walnuts. What do you call nuts on a chest? : chestnuts . What do you call nuts on your chin? A dick in your mouth."

"TIFU by hooking up with a girl named Jenny jk fuck Jenny and Zach"

"Jesus: He who is without sin may cast the first stone *guy with no legs throws rock* Jesus: Seriously? ""You said 'without shins,' right?"""

"Making writing mistakes is in my blood. Type O."

"I thought nothing could be more embarrassing than finding my dad's playboys in the closet. Until one of them tried to shake my hand."

"Pro is the opposite of con right? Well then what is the opposite of congress?"

"How did Harry Potter cross the road? Walking Jk rolling"