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Joke of the Day
"A police man pulled me over and said ""papers"". So I said ""Scissors! I win"" and drove off"
Next Joke
"While commemorating my father's various physical feats, one friend asked if he was ""shredded"". He was cremated. :("
"Wanna hear a joke about Youtube comments? I'll tell it once this gets 500 upvotes."
"How do you get rid of pubic lice? Seriously, it is not a joke. I really want to know."
"[at the zoo] Llama spits in my face I spit in llamas face Llama slaps me I grab llamas hair Scuffle ensues Llamas gf shouts ""leave it Gary!"""
"I run a suicide hotline. A guy called me once, told me I had 60 seconds to convince him not to jump off his balcony on the 41st floor. He must've confused me with the *anti*-suicide hotline."
"I used to love John Deere and Massey Ferguson... but now I'm an ex-tractor fan."
"Just wondering what is a funny punchline to: (saw this incomplete joke in southpark) A baptist priest with a huge boner walks into a bar..."
"Give me five hundred good reasons you think I'm too demanding."
"What's the name of that Adam Sandler's movie were he plays an immature adult?"