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Joke of the Day

"Just wondering what is a funny punchline to: (saw this incomplete joke in southpark) A baptist priest with a huge boner walks into a bar..."

"What is the difference between rat poison and diet coke? Diet coke has better advertising."

"*hands you baby* Here's your Christmas present I got it at the mall but it didn't come with a gift receipt & people may be looking for it."

"What happened when the cannibal ate the speaking clock? It repeated on him."

"Why does Z hate being at the end of the alphabet? Because he spends all day with a Y's ass."

"What if your pillow could collect your dreams and when you wake up you plug it into your computer and watch them over again"

"Because of the disregard towards safety techniques people not only die but are also born."

"Everyone was dreaming of working for Steve Jobs except his pancreas"

"My wife walked in on me and found me f***ing our daughter... I didn't know what she found more disturbing, the fact I was f***ing our daughter, or that the abortion clinic sold me her fetus."

"Wanna dance? I can really put your inertia in motion."