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Joke of the Day

"A Quebecer staying in a hotel in Edmonton phoned room service for some pepper. ""Black pepper, or white pepper?"" asked the concierge. ""Toilette pepper!"" yelled the Quebecer."

"Went to dinner with a recovering alcoholic vegan who just quit smoking. Everything entering or leaving my mouth was offensive #WorstDateEver"

"The best part about twitter is that it is completely satisfying on a deep emotional level and in no way makes me feel empty inside."

"A priest and a rabbi are walking and spot a little boy The priest says, ""let's fuck him."" The rabbi says, ""out of what?"""

"""This week has been an emotional roller coaster. I'm gonna open up a bottle of red and take a long, hot bath."" - white women"

"I asked a coworker if she liked Mila Kunis. She said yes and all the better if I call her a whore afterwards. Then I saw her hearing aid."

"Girl, did it hurt...when you fell from heaven? *smooshed girl bobs away making accordion sounds*"

"Why don't Bond villains feel cold in the winter? Because they dress in lairs."

"Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent. Hello Jack."

"Why is PC the mustard race? Because consoles can't ketchup."