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Joke of the Day

"When arguing, I let the other person speak first, then help them see my point by starting with, ""Now, what I'm about to say is correct"""

"They told him: your girlfriend is cheating on you.. He wiped away his tears & asked : Which one ?"

"How do hispanics cut a pizza? Little Caesars"

"What did Saturn tell it's moons when they started getting too far away? ""Titan up!"""

"What's the difference between an Afghan Military Base and a Pakistani School? I don't know, I just fly the drone."

"Doctor Doctor I keep dreaming of bats creepy-crawlies demons ghosts monsters vampires werewolves and yetis. Doctor: How interesting. Do you always dream in alphabetical order?"

"I'm on my way to Williston, ND. It's the most in the middle of nowhere I've ever been. I plan to show them the iPad and claim to be Jesus."

"Girl, is your name Trouble? ...cause your dad tells me I'm in trouble."

"What do neutrinos and I have in common. We are both constantly penetrating your mom."

"At some point your mother has purposely clicked on a link displaying a black penis. Sweet dreams."