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Joke of the Day

"Of course I like you, which is why I have to act like I don't like you so you'll know how much I like you."

"What type of clothing does a House wear? Address."

"Frownie wink wins for most confusing emoji ;("

"What did the Italian bigfoot say when someone yelled, ""Hey Abominable Snowman, are you ready to go?"" ""Not-a-Yeti"""

"Did you hear that the Department of Agriculture is outlawing round bales of hay? They claimed the cows weren't getting a square meal."

"Q: Did you hear about the bulimic bachelor party? A: The cake came out of the girl."

"A horse-drawn carriage sounds really romantic until you realize horses can't even hold a pen and the carriage just looks like a scribble."

"I like my panties like I like my bass... Dropped"

"if i opened my Gryffindor Would you Slytherin?"

"What do you call an Irishman sitting on your front porch? Paddy O'Furniture"