26097

Joke of the Day

"Why was the Trail of Tears so hard on the Native Americans? It's not easy to hike a trail when you're always falling down drunk."

"I have a lot of jokes about the unemployed... ...but none of them work."

"I was feeling very depressed the other week. I went to my psychiatrist and told him I was suicidal. He asked me to pay in advance."

"What's the difference between me and a calendar? The calendar has dates *sigh*"

"What do Fall Out Boy say after titty-fucking their girlfriends? THANKS FOR THE MAMMARIES!"

"How do generals show their gratitude to their troops? They give tanks."

"TIL that they have raised the minimum drinking age in Arkansas to 32. It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools."

"Hillary Clinton sucks! No she doesn't, because if she did Bill wouldn't have Monica."

"I like most ancient cities... But I Constantinople."

"I just found out what ballerinas call their dresses. I just put two and two together."