89456

Joke of the Day

"Be yourself; everyone else is already Batman."

"How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Ask them to pronounce unionized."

"Man walks into a rod He doesn't understand comedy"

"My friend told me he was going to a fancy dress party as an Italian island. I said to him 'Don't be Sicily"

"[1st date] Me: don't let him know you're a lobster Him: we should check out my hot-tub later Me: 'yeah...sure' *nervously clicks claws*"

"BB8, are you hungry? No, BB8."

"Last night me and my girlfriend watched three DVDs back to back Luckily I was the one facing the TV"

"Just once I'd like to have the confidence to order something off of a menu without having to look at the menu while I'm ordering it."

"a little known fact A little known fact but 6 out of 7 dwarfs ain't Happy......"

"My 6yo has been rolling around on the floor for 30 mins whining for me to get her some juice cause SHE doesn't want to Go ahead. Have kids"