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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a woman with six kids? Lucy"

"What do you call a woman who can balance 5 pints of lager on each arm? Beatrix"

"Sorry I unfollowed you on Instagram, but you take at least 10 pics of your face everyday. I don't even look at my wife that much."

"Revenge is a dish best served with a laxative that looks like chocolate."

"teen son: 'cause the boyz n the hood are always hard /u come talkin that trash we'll pull your card mom: take out the trash & mow the yard."

"Which insect didn't play well in goal ? The fumble bee !"

"Why did God allow women to get yeast infections? So they could know what it was like to live with an irritating cunt sometimes.."

"I asked my pusher for something to burn that would get me stoned. He gave me the Koran."

"*doctor moonwalks into office* ""Your test results are back Mr Johnson. You tested positive for BEING FABULOUS!!"" *Mr Johnson does the robot*"

"Whats the worst part about Crabgrass? It's Not Lobster."