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Joke of the Day

"[boss's office] BOSS: Do you like my fire place? ME: Actually, it's one word: ""fireplace"" BOSS: You're fired ME: Oh, I get it now"

"I finally found my wife's G-spot! Who would have thought her sister had it the whole time?"

"Remember that guy that told us that he had no asshole? I think he's full of shit."

"Looking at all the post on my news feed, it is very hot today. News Flash people, it is summertime. That is what happens in summer months. Keep me posted in January also when it is cold out. Thanks"

"[NSFW] What is the best engine ever made in this world? A vagina! 1. It takes any size pistons. 2. It auto lubricates itself 3. every 28 days it performs automatic oil changes."

"Why'd the seaman cross the road? Because I wore the wrong sock that day."

"The Mongols In the early days of their empire the mongols were openly mocked by their enemies for being so small and weak. Needless to say, Genghis khan really *stepped* up to the challenge."

"Dentist: ""You need a crown."" - Patient: ""Finally someone who understands me"""

"""It takes 2 to tangle."" - iPod ear buds."

"What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Christopher Walken"