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Joke of the Day

"Bought a bag of Sweetheart candies & cracked my tooth on one.When I spit it out & looked at it,itsaid ""Next time call when you say you will"""

"I've had to break up with my imaginary girlfriend. I've started seeing someone else."

"A boy goes into a butcher's shop and says, Mum says can we please have a sheep's head..."". ""...and you're to leave the eyes in 'cos it's got to see us through the week."" Credit to Terry Pratchett."

"The safe word is ""MMMBop."""

"What's the difference between a women's argument and a knife? The knife has a point !"

"How to become a The Fray fan in easy steps - Step 1: You say, ""We need to talk..."""

"I have my own version of Whole Foods, where I eat the Whole Pizza, Whole Box of Donuts, Whole Bag of Chips..."

"What is Rhiannas favorite type of cheese? mozzarella-ella-ella"

"Sorry my diet made me slap the oreo out of your toddler's hand and scream ""NOT TODAY SATAN!"""

"Did you hear about the reusable condoms? When you're done, turn them inside out and shake the fuck out of them."