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Joke of the Day

"*throws coin in fountain* stranger: can you not do that? Me: just want my wish to come true S: this is a drinking fountain m: wish came true"

"Stranger: ""Hey, I like your beard!"" Me: ""Thanks, it's really growing on me"""

"What did Treebeard say when he took a piss? RELEASE THE RIVERRR!!!!!!!"

"""Chivalry isn't dead,"" I say, watching one zombie hold the door open for another."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Anatole ! Anatole who ? Anatole me you're a pain in the neck !"

"Superman can save the world but Clark Kent"

"Mechanic: you need a new carburetor Me: you can call it a buretor, I know lots about cars, I'm like you"

"Give a boy a fish, he eats for a day. Give Albert Fish a boy, he eats for a week."

"Your momma is so old.... she used to get off on fifty slates of grey"

"What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato."