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Joke of the Day

"Father Christmas: All right my good lady my face is my ticket. Box office attendant: Then you'd better watch out... there's a feller inside who has the job of punching the tickets."

Next Joke
 
"I don't know who the pun editor of the NY Post is, but the headline PEACHES' DEATH IS STILL FUZZY deserves a citation and/or beating."
"Stop telling me your newborns weight and length. I don't know what to do with that information."
"Sarah Palin admitted she used to get health care in Canada & Glenn Beck admitted he used to get his human baby sacrifices from Canada."
"They canceled school and reminded everyone to ""Prepare for a blackout"" I've got 2 bottles of Vodka and percocet Blackout is *so happening*"
"Why do people at home on TV have their pants on?"
"My teeth are so crooked they should run for office."
"Why was the scarecrow promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field!"
"Bruce Willis found dead.... ....bored with acting"
"What do you call a smart blonde? A Labrador retriever"