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Joke of the Day

"Why don't boxers have sex before a fight? Because they don't like each other."

"Just once, I'd like to sleep as deeply as a cartoon sheriff whose keys are dangling seductively from his belt."

"I met up with my internet friend yesterday. We were both disappointed when we realised we were both middle aged men, and not 10-year-old girls."

"Lets be real here, everyone has laughed at a child falling over in public,at least once, why ? Because its funny."

"Fat girls are like mopeds. They're fun to ride until your friends find out."

"5-year-old: Dad! Dad! My sister- Me: Stop tattling. I don't want to hear about it unless there's blood. 5: Me: 5: How much blood?"

"What should you do if you're cold? Stand in a corner. They're usually 90 degrees."

"Did you hear about the monster who had an extra pair of hands? Where did he keep them? In a handbag."

"What is the oldest joke in the book? The first one written"

"What is the best animal related joke you know? These jokes should be any jokes that are even vaguely related to animals!"