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Joke of the Day

"He took both kids grocery shopping by himself so I could ""relax"" so now I'm sitting here suspicious that he's done something to piss me off."

"People really hate my cheesy puns... but I'm quite fondue of them."

"Which vitamine are feminists missing? D"

"[finally rich enough to go to a tailor] ""How can I help you sir?"" One clothes please!"

"Chuck Norris was once on Jeopardy. This show is notable in that it was the first occasion in Jeopardy history that Alex Trebek had appeared without a mustache. And a head."

"What would Apple laptops be called if Steve Jobs had been Irish? McBook Eyre"

"If you're going to get in trouble for hitting someone, might aswell hit them hard."

"""Shake what your mama gave ya."" ""You want me to shake a $25 Macy's gift card?"""

"Cosmo says ""untamed va-jay-jays"" are back in style. Can't they call them car wash mitts like the rest of us?"

"What's the difference between ironman and ironwoman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command."