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Joke of the Day

"[accidentally makes eye contact with someone] Oh my God, I am so sorry. Are you OK?"

"What's the difference between a public park and a public toilet? I need to know before my court date on Monday."

"Pansexuality is the best... fuck the rest."

"One ply toilet paper. Get in touch with your inner self."

"Why did linkin park wrap themselves up in plastic wrap before they jumped off a cliff? So in the end they didn't even splatter."

"18 goes into 40 more than 40 goes into 18 ( ~ )"

"My wife said to go out and buy something that makes her look hot & sexy for Valentine's Day! So I got drunk..."

"i dont see why i should have to brush my teeth. you dont brush the rest of your bones, do you? its ridiculous."

"So I had a threesome last night... There were a couple of no-shows but I still had fun"

"What do religions and gender have in common? You hear about a new one every day and none of them make any sense."