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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a public park and a public toilet? I need to know before my court date on Monday."

"Jackie stood quietly as her father examined her report card. ""What is this 45 in math?"" asked her father. ""I think that's the size of the class"" she said quickly!"

"Pretty arrogant of Red Delicious Apples to put ""delicious"" in their name. Like calm down. You're still just an apple. You ain't no prize."

"A nurse asks an absent-minded doctor, ""Doctor, why are you writing with a thermometer?"" The doctor looks down and says, ""God damnit. Now some asshole has my pen."""

"Ladies, love yourself first or nobody will @MaleHonesty86"

"What computer monitor sings the best? A Dell."

"Why does America spell some words differently? They said ""We can do it without u, Britain."""

"""Haha you flinched"" ""No crap, you almost hit me in the face!"""

"Why are Wayne and Garth banned from playgrounds? They hog the Schwing set."

"""GRAAAAAAIIIINNNNS"" Vegetarian Zombie"