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Joke of the Day

"Need your help. Give me some bear puns! or I will kill you with my BEAR hands"

"My name is Jafar. I come from afar. Some place in Quatar. I work at bazaar. I sell snake in a jar. I have bomb in my car. Allu ak bar."

"When's the best time to see an optometrist? When you can't."

"When Jesus makes tea. Hebrews."

"My 16yo daughters boyfriend struggled with a capri sun for the last 10 minutes. I think it's ok to leave her alone with him."

"What do you call a snail on a ship? A snailor!!"

"[arrives at sales meeting with giraffe I bought last month] ""Ok, did everyone bring a graph tracking your activity this month?"" ME: uh oh"

"*Lysol kills 99.9% of germs on my counter* LYSOL: ""Hey .1% germs... ( -_-)>- (_) Tell your friends"""

"What do you get if you cross a mosquito and a mountain climber? No one knows. You can't cross a vector and a scalar."

"Whats the difference between a pun, and a fart? One is a shift of wit and the other is a whiff of shit."