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Joke of the Day
"Was your ass freed from enslavement? Because it's off the chain."
Next Joke
"Shoutout to the wife for stacking her shampoo bottles in the shower like she's on her last 3 turns on Jenga."
"I was in a bad place when my girlfriend broke up with me. A brothel."
"Burger King employee: what size [drink] would you like? Me (thinking she said 'side'): fries. BK: What? Me: *more forcefully* fries."
"If ""six degrees"" is true, somebody tell somebody to tell somebody to tell somebody to tell somebody to tell Scarlett Johansson I said ""Hi."""
"You're so ugly, when you were born your mom said... ""What a treasure"" and your dad said ""Lets go bury it!"""
"Why aren't there any British Communists? Because communists believe all proper tea is theft."
"Did you hear about the new skat porno? it's full of shit"
"If I get married I want my last name to be hyphenated. Mr. and Mrs. Hyphenated."
"One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in stunningly sexy lingerie. ""Tie me up,"" she purred, ""And you can do anything you want."" So he tied her up and went golfing."