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Joke of the Day

"I don't think I could be a mom. Listening to another person cry all night just seems awful & I wouldn't want to impose that on a baby."

"Where do you park Two Ships of Theseus? At a Pair of Docks"

"I heard a joke today that made me shit myself. It was just a bit of self-defecating humor."

"Why was the band late to their gig? Because the drummer locked himself in the car with the keys."

"A man walks into a bar, looks at the bartender and says...... please fill in a punch line"

"What do dildos and tofu have in common? They're both substitutes for meat."

"How many NYPD officers does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just beat the room for being black."

"What do you call a black man flying a plane? Pilot. You racist fuck."

"How many Heros does it take to screw in a lightbulb? All, to save this world from the darkness."

"Q: Why does a viola burn longer than a violin? A: It is usually still in the case."