23836
Joke of the Day
"Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make Then they call me ugly and poor"
Next Joke
"I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high... ...she seemed surprised."
"*bakes 12 cookies* *waits for family to come home* *eats 12* *family arrives* 5 year old: ""I SMELL COOKIES!"" ""Weird! Here's a salad."""
"Once there was a guy... ...who had a dog with no legs. Everyday he took him out for a drag."
"I'm an archaeologist... My life is in ruins."
"Why did my friend throw my computer out the window? So A Dell could message me and say Hello from the other side."
"Guys, be sensitive. Fat people have feelings too. Usually hunger, shortness of breath, insecurity and itchiness in unreachable places."
"Nobody deserves to look that peaceful sleeping. SLAP."
"Why did Hillary Clinton had her campaign chairman John Podesta send the crowd home from the Clinton HQ? She 'accidently' deleted the email with her consession speech."
"So God, a Jew and a Zombie walk into a bar... The bartender says, ""Hey Jesus"""