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Joke of the Day

"""I'm still years behind on Breaking Bad so I expect the entire internet not to discuss it until it's convenient for me."" - Idiots"

"Wanna hear a bird joke?! I don't have one... This is hawkward."

"Given how, when I try to eat a banana, I end up holding the peel while the actual fruit falls to the floor, I'm ok never handling a firearm."

"I successfully said ""Worcestershire sauce"" today!"

"While we still don't know the motivations or the thought process behind the Boston Bombings I think it's safe to say that the perpetrators are racists."

"My wife has two weeks left to live... Then I'm going to stab her."

"Best blonde jokes?"

"It is by Caffeine Alone I Set My Mind in Motion... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yorfOiQvkew"

"How many Vietnam vets does it take to change a light bulb? YOU DON'T KNOW!!! YOU WEREN'T THERE!!!!"

"A boy asks his Jewish father for 50 dollars... The father looked at his son and asked, ""40 dollars? What do you need 30 dollars for?"""