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Joke of the Day

"Why doesn't people with two dicks get into the porn industry? Because they know they'll be fucked over. Edit: Don't, not doesn't. Sorry can't change title."

"How do you make a blonde's eyes light up? Shine a flashlight in their ear. "

"What's a Polar Bear's favourite soup? A laksa."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Crewcut ! Crewcut who? Crewcut and I'm the only one left !"

"I have on my new shoes today. They are so cute, and comfortable, as long as I don't stand in them or walk in them."

"What do dark jokes and food have in common? Not everyone gets them"

"It's looking like Hillary is definitely going to win the election I think I might move to Benghazi, at least she'll leave me alone there."

"yo mama's o fat she supplies 99% of British gas."

"""millennials sure do love APPS!!"" i can edit a movie on my phone. you used to harass women for recreation. go back to watching suits grandpa"

"A ginger wanted to join the Jazz band... But he didn't have enough soul."