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Joke of the Day

"In an elevator with my geology professor and my ex-geology professor. Can you say ROCKward?"

"What do you call two crows standing side by side? Attempted murder."

"How do you get Holy water? You boil the Hell out of it."

"Just got an email from dominoes said ""easy and delicious"" they sure know how to talk to a single guy!"

"I failed stats because i have no faith in myself.. I couldn't find anything more than a 0% confidence interval."

"Life is like a penis. Simple, relaxed and hanging around freely... It's women who make it hard."

"Q: What do you call a group of people who share bathroom facilities? A: party poopers"

"I spend an awful lot of time picking the most desirable potato chips out of the bag for someone who's going to eat them all anyway."

"You walk into my bedroom... I'm laying naked with a platter of nachos on my chest. You get punched while trying to take some of my nachos."

"How many feminists does it take to screw in lightbulb? It doesn't matter how many you get, because all they'll do is sit around complaining about how misogynistic the use of the word ""screw"" is."