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Joke of the Day

"I dropped my phone in the toilet, so I put it in a bowl of rice, and waited for the Asians to come and fix it."

"There are 10 types of people in this world. . . People who understand binary and people who don't."

"[creation] GOD: Let's name some of you bugs FLY: Me first! GOD: Okay...Fly FLY: Hell yeah! BUTTERFLY: Now me! GOD: Hmm...Butterfly FLY: Sonuvab-"

"I call bullshit, airport baby changing station! I wanted an Asian baby but I'm stuck with the white kid I flew in with."

"I just misspelled a word so bad that auto correct blew milk out its nose."

"Chuck Norris qualified with a top speed of 324 mph at the Daytona 500, without a car."

"The last person to enter parliament with honest intentions was Guy Fawkes."

"Dem puns... Why are there two hundred and thirty-nine beans in Irish Bean Soup? Because if there be one moar, it'd be too farty!"

"'Brexit' to be followed by Grexit. Departugal. Italeave. Fruckoff. Czechout. Oustria. Finish. Slovakout. Latervia. Byegium."

"""So, how's life in North Korea?"" ""Well, I can't complain!"""