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Joke of the Day
"Did you hear about the sarcastic washing machine? It takes the piss out of your knickers."
Next Joke
"I believe a lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided completely if architects in those days had just made their towns big enough for everyone."
"Who would you like for president in 2020? Anyone who doesn't have poor visions."
"ISIS has a lot in common with Little Miss Muffet They've both got Kurds in their way"
"I've limited my friends to 3 people that know how to split a dinner bill w/o causing a fiasco and life has been awesome since."
"[having sex with centaur] ME: *man that fortune cookie was spooky accurate*"
"I miss the days if you were angry while on the phone, you could slam it down without costing $400!"
"How will an IT guy fix a lamp? He'll restart the nuclear power plant"
"What's black and sits at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a housefire"
"Use chemicals to remove polish and no one bats an eye, Use chemicals to remove the Polish and you're literally Hitler."