228450

Joke of the Day

"There's a technical term for a sunny warm day which follows two rainy days. It's called Monday."

"99% of humanity Works on the principle of rocket science. It does not mean , we always aim for the sky; it means that we do not start work unless our tail is on fire."

"I saw this one guy really, really beat Bobby Flay It was his ex wife's lawyer."

"What do you call a nose without a body? Nobody knows..."

"What's green and eats nuts? Syphillis"

"When my girlfriend is angry, I go to Facebook and constantly refresh my relationship status to see if I'm single again."

"I think it's funny how I can sleep right through my blaring alarm clock but I'll wake up to the slightest phantom vibrations from my phone."

"The Tortoise and the Hare is a classic story about how people who like to run are awful."

"My grandpa was always disappointed in me.... When I was five my grandpa was always disappointed in me. He would tell me ""when I was your age I was six."""

"How is it when my son has homework,I have to be involved?? Dude,I already did my time."