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Joke of the Day

"What did the quiet orange say to the noisy orange? ""Be quiet, I'm concentrating!"""

"Women like silent men... they think they're listening!"

"What did the McDonald's addict suddenly realize? ...I'm lovin' shit"

"Why didn't the feminist shave her arm pits? Just kidding, just wanted to rile a few people up. But if you want to have a punchline contest, feel free."

"What's the most positive thing about Harlem? HIV"

"Darth Vader: What is the temperature of my son's lightsaber? Lukewarm."

"My girlfriend's dog died, so to cheer her up I went out and got her an identical one. She was livid: ""What am I going to do with two dead dogs?"""

"So Abraham Lincoln walks into a bar... ...and says, ""I'll have a shot."" Did I just make up a new lame joke, or has this been done before? I think I need to sleep."

"Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman!"

"I won every fight in 1st grade. Not because I was tough, because I was 13."