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Joke of the Day

"There's good climate in heaven, but a better company in hell."

"What did the doctor say to the midget waiting in the lobby? You're just going to have to be a little patient."

"""Are u going to the circus?"" is a perfectly good sentence when not used as a follow-up 2 your wife's question: ""how does my make-up look?"""

"My math teacher said I was average. How mean!"

"All the doctors at this hospital must have gone to This-Piece-Of-Medical-Equipment-Is-Not-A-Toy University and majored in ""boring""."

"Dun-na-na-na-na-na-na-na Running down the motor-way, A lorr-ie comes the other-way, Dun-na-na-na-na-na-na-na, Splat-Man!"

"Why do apes climb to the tops of buildings? The elevator men are on strike!"

"Oh you're a Football fan? Okay then name 3 of their albums. Yeah. That's what I thought."

"What's the difference between a Syrian school and a terrorist camp? I don't know, I'm just flying the drone"

"Gandalf chuckled to himself as the boat left shore. ""I just noticed,"" he whispered, ""your name sounds like Dildo"" #LastLinesFromGreatBooks"