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Joke of the Day
"Oh you're a Football fan? Okay then name 3 of their albums. Yeah. That's what I thought."
Next Joke
"My kids don't believe that before video games, we used to have to go out and buy a hedgehog, paint it blue, then give it cocaine."
"My friend showed me a black computer he wanted to buy... I said ""Dont you mean an African American computer?"" and he replied ""Stop being so PC"""
"So a horse walks into a bar... ...and the bartender asks, ""Hey buddy, why the long face?"" The horse looks up and responds, ""I'm out of the job! Sarah Jessica Parker started doing her own stunts."""
"Useless trying to undo a mistake. Focus your efforts on new ones."
"Why did Eminem make a terrible barista? Because he kept insisting everyone only get one shot."
"I wrote a song about tortillas. Actually, it's more of a rap."
"Every so often I'll listen to my wife talk non stop for hours at a time to remind myself why people wander into traffic without looking."
"I ran out of coffee this morning, beer seemed like an acceptable replacement. Everyone is so pretty today."
"So if Humpty Dumpty is an egg, what species is the thing inside him? Another egg? ""No I mean do you have any questions about the job?"""