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Joke of the Day

"When you get to my age, your milkshake still brings boys to the yard, but they're like ""I'm lactose intolerant."""

"3 unwritten rules of life 1) 2) 3)"

"What does a Chihuahua play basketball with? A tennis ball!"

"I got a paper cut writing my suicide note It's a start"

"If I had a bodyguard, I'm pretty sure he'd just spend most of his time sighing and saying ""Don't eat that..."""

"What do you call Triple H practicing for a WWE match? Preparation H"

"News:""a black bear hovered over a convenience store in central Florida for more than seven hours..."" They have hover bears? jealous again"

"What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything"

"""What's that?"" A divorce jar. Every time we fight you put a dollar in and I'm a little bit closer to freedom. *puts in dollar* ""WTH!?!"""

"Which author do the Gorillas love most? Joh Steinbeck - who wrote 'The Apes of Wrath!'"