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Joke of the Day
"Q: What is the best recording of the Walton viola concerto? A: Music Minus One."
Next Joke
"Whats the best part about sex with a pregnant woman? You get a blowjob from the fetus."
"I'd rather my son bring home a pregnant girl than head lice"
"""No, you hang up"" No, you hang up. ""No, you hang up"" No, you hang up. ""No you hang up"" *slams phone* Why do I keep calling that parrot?!"
"If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims!"
"What if we've got it backwards? Maybe mustaches have a thing for pedophiles."
"*watching husband sleep* Me: ""I just love him so much, he's my everyth-"" *husband snores* Me: ""I can't live like this."""
"Question starts with a Q... ...and ends with an E."
"What kind of seagull flies over a bay? A Bay-gull"
"Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the toilet? Because the P is silent."