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Joke of the Day

"Loan shark: If you're late my guys will ... Me: Tell my gf my phone password? LS: Break every bone in your body M: Oh. Yeah that's fine"

"I like my buttcheeks like how i like my babies Clean"

"Went to the doctor the other day, he told me I had to stop lap-dancing. I asked him why and he said, ""Because I'm trying to examine you."""

"Politics is like a game of rock-paper-scissors. Gun beats everything."

"A man has been admitted to hospital after pushing 6 plastic horses up his anus. Doctors declared his condition as ""stable""."

"Pink Panther's TODO list 1. TODO 2. TODO 3. TODO TODO TODO TODO TODOOO"

"What does a chicken call its backpack? A BokBok..."

"On cold mornings, it'd be helpful if a menacing man screamed obscenities at me in German so I'd get out of the shower."

"When it comes to volunteering on my gynecology residency, I'm the first to put my hand up."

"Three old men are sitting on a bench One says, ""Windy today."" Another says, ""No you idiot, it's Thursday."" The third one says, ""Me too. Let's go get a beer."""