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Joke of the Day
"I accidentally got my blow up doll pregnant. Related: I've got some balloons for sale."
Next Joke
"A joke my three year old brother told me Why do cows poop carrots? BECAUSE THEY'RE CARROT COWS!!!"
"Knowledge is Power They always say knowledge is power, but I'm pretty sure I can beat up Stephen Hawking."
"A horse walks into a bar.... The barman says. , ""why the long face?"""
"I guess the guy who named the space between stuff in the universe ""space"" was just tired."
"HELLO, 911? I'M FALLING DOWN AN ELEVATOR SHAFT. YES, RIGHT NOW. VERY SLOWLY, THAT'S HOW. HOLD ON, SOMEONE JOINED. WHOA, NOW WE'RE FALLING UP"
"I went out with one woman who turned out to be an arsonist. I met her on match.com"
"What's the difference between a hockey player and my exgirlfriend? A hockey player will shower after 3 periods"
"I'm gonna hire a person to speak at my funeral and say a bunch of crazy stuff about me so my friends and family think I had a secret life."
"Goodnight honey. ""Daddy, where do babies come from?"" The stork flies them in. ""Why's it take 9 months?"" Wind resistance. Go to sleep."