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Joke of the Day

"What do you call gonorrhea that takes a long time to show up? Slow clap."

"Drugs don't ruin people's lives, drug tests do."

"I'm trying to envision something more fitting than this election actually ending in a Biden-Trump fist fight and i cannot"

"How many Freudians does it take to change a lightbulb? One to unscrew it, and one to hold the ~~cock~~ ~~father~~ ladder."

"Why did the Bear dissolve in water? He was polar"

"I'm not condescending! Try and count how many times I've been condescending! Exactly; you can't cause you're a dumbass."

"I named my hard drive ""dat ass""... Once a month, my computer asks if I want to 'back dat ass up'."

"Did you hear about the kidnapping in Southampton? Don't worry, he woke up"

"Why was Jesus in such good shape when he died? He was Cross-Fit."

"What did the doctor call his new metal band? Inflamed"