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Joke of the Day

"Alphabet Soup I ate 4 bowls of delicious alphabet soup. After that I had a massive vowel movement."

"*sees a baby screaming on the plane* wait-- WAIT. WHY IS HE SCREAMING. OH MY GOD WHY IS HE SCREAMING. WHAT DOSE HE KNOW THAT WE DONT"

"*Caterpillar marriage therapy* Wife: he's not the man I married Husband flying around room: I'm the same on the inside Karen!!!"

"My friend showed me her new vegan pants. I know vegans can be annoying and everything, but should we really be making pants out of them?"

"Reddit Jokes are so stupid! See what I did there?"

"Ladies, the word for the day is ""legs."" Spread the word."

"A classic Tommy Cooper gag ''I said to the Gym instructor ""Can you teach me to do the splits?'' He said, ''How flexible are you?'' I said, ''I can't make Tuesdays'', was fifth."

"Schizophrenia I`m in two minds about it"

"What's the definition of apathy? I don't know, and I don't care."

"What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung? The guardians of the galaxy!"