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Joke of the Day

"The first rule of flight club is.. ..turn the airplane on. & you should probably learn how to read."

"I'm on a new diet where I can only eat and drink things where I know what the ingredients mean. I can now tell you every ingredients use in Cheetos, how it's obtained, and the molecular structure."

"My grandma accidentally swallowed a fly. Feeding her a spider now..."

"What do you call a party with 7 girls & 70 midgets? 10 books of Snow Whites"

"All I'm saying is God wouldn't have given me this wild hair if he didn't want me to store stuff in it. *baby hedgehog peaks out*"

"TIL Only three types of mammals go through menopause. The Blue Whale, The Beluga Whale, and You're Mom"

"What does a waffle call his complete existential paradigm shift? His eggo death"

"Why did the nun call the Womens helpline? because she was touched by Jesus."

"Did you hear about the Mexican racist? he joined the que que que."

"Why do Jewish men get circumcised? Because Jewish women love anything 20% off."