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Joke of the Day

"What do a midget and a dwarf have in common? Very little."

"I called into a suicide hotline And they tried to save my life, talk about misleading."

"Approx 4,500yrs ago men would wake up everyday to build the great pyramid. I got up this morning with anxiety about unloading the dishwasher"

"Feminism! Q: How many feminists does it take to change a baby's diaper? A: Don't be silly, feminists can't change anything. And besides, where would they find a baby!"

"You don't need to learn how to masturbate, It comes naturally."

"Don't you hate that feeling when you close your eyes to apply shampoo, and get paranoid that someone will kill you in the shower."

"Why is it wrong to be on the left? Because it's not right."

"My father once told me, ""Son, if you want people to listen to what you have to say, claim it's something your father told you."""

"What's the difference between a paycheck and a penis? You don't have to beg your girlfriend to blow your paycheck!"

"There are some benefits to having alzheimers For example, you get to meet new people constantly."