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Joke of the Day

"After a night of drinking, John walks into a metal bar The music was great and he hooks up with a beautiful blonde. He awakes at the hospital with a mild concussion."

"What do you call a man in the window? INNUENDO!!!!!!!"

"As a man of faith, I am upset about the trend of dirty jokes on this subreddit All I'm saying is let's keep it age appropriate for pillow talk here at the rectory."

"I got my kid a puppy as a present, but it died before Christmas. Now I'm fucking stuck taking care of a puppy."

"What is the capital of Greece? $20 (A friend told me this a few days ago)."

"What did the piston say to the freely expanding gas? No pressure"

"I'm not saying my mates wife is fat or anything but in February she starts working in Ibiza Selling shade."

"Do you know the difference between mono and herpes? You get mono from snatching a kiss, but you get herpes from kissing a snatch."

"I used to be in a band called The Prevention We hoped people would say we were better than The Cure."

"Hell is an eternity of being sober in a room full of drunk people."