22546

Joke of the Day

"In my day, you actually had to leave your house to be a whore. Thanks, internet."

"How does a SQL expert get a date? getDate() ^(I really hope this doesn't do well, so cheap, so stupid, just had to write it when I thought of it)"

"what do you call an animal that's neither a herbivore nor a carnivore?? an om-nom-nomnivore"

"Why was the school principal not pleased when he bumped into an old friend ? They were both driving their cars at the time !"

"Q: What is 61 to a blonde? A: She wants 8 (ate) more."

"[NSFW] What's long, cylindrical, hard, full of semen and can make a woman scream? The sock under your bed."

"I was trying to find my flying drone Then it hit me"

"[1st Day working at Hotel California] Guest: Id like 2 check out Me: Sure! Youre all set! G: Thanks! [Leaves] Boss: Can I see u in my office"

"I asked my friend if I could borrow some money for condoms.... He gave me five bucks, and I told him ""Thanks for the *fucking* money."""

"What happened to the Japanese Senator with Erectile Dis-function that didn't get enough votes this year. He rost the erection."