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Joke of the Day

"What's the sound that a French tank does just before the enemy frontline attacks? Beep Beep Beep..."

"Woman calls 911 about a peeping tom in her yard 911: ""How do you know he's a peeping tom?"" Woman: ""When I asked him what he was doing out there, he said 'I was trying to get a pikachu'""."

"I'm a big fan of wood. Mahogany. Cherry. Walnut. Morning."

"Being a vegetarian is a missed steak. That's the joke. Now, fuck off!"

"I knew this guy who would ask men at church, ""is your tie made out of bird cloth?"" <blank stare> ""It's cheep, cheep, cheep."""

"You want to hear an old racist joke? Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Told that by an old homeless guy."

"I named my hard drive ""dat ass""... Once a month, my computer asks if I want to 'back dat ass up'."

"How many pedants does it take to replace a burnt light bulb? Glass doesn't burn."

"How do Sesame Street characters reproduce? Big bird's eggs and ABCmen."

"Good call inventor of glass tables. There's nothing more appetizing than realizing Aunt Mildred doesn't wear panties while I'm trying to eat"