224660

Joke of the Day

"Cleanliness is next to godliness in a dictionary missing some stuff"

"What did the terrorists say after blowing himself up before getting to his destination? Too soon?"

"What do you call a helicopter with a bad paint job? A patchy gunship"

"22,110! 22,109! 22,108! 22,107! 22,106! 22,105! 22,104! 22,103! 22,102! 22,101! 22,100! 22,099! 22,098! 22,097! 22,096! 22,095! 22,094!"

"What kind of overalls does Mario wear? denimdenimdenim"

"Why was the tomato blushing? Answer: ...Because it saw the salad dressing!"

"For sale: Standards. Mint condition. Barely used."

"A scarecrow just won a Nobel prize. It was for being out-standing in his field."

"A horse walks into a police station Policeman says ""Why the long face?"" Horse replies ""I've just witnessed a murder"" [True story](http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-merseyside-29550834)"

"Don't you hate when you're at the mall and there's a kid that just won't shut up. You're like, ""SHHH!"" And he's all, ""STRANGER! DANGER!"