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Joke of the Day
"Why did the condom cross the road? It was pissed off. :3"
Next Joke
"Boss: Are you high? Me: If I was high could I do this? *teleports two inches to the right*"
"Nice hourglass figure, girl. Wanna come back to my place and stand on your head so my friends and I can keep time while we play Pictionary?"
"I stopped writing poetry when I realized their only value was to threaten to read them to people if they didn't do what I wanted."
"Why british wete at war with nazi germany? Because they couldnt afford another Aryans stealing their tea."
"Why did Adele cross the road? Because she wanted to say: > Hello from the other side..."
"Did you hear about the dyslexic pimp? He bought a warehouse."
"What is the best joke you have heard? Any best joke"
"My girlfriend and I used to argue in bed... I liked to sleep all stretched out like a starfish, and she liked to sleep with a Russian body-builder called Ivan."
"My chiropractor told me I have to stop using air quotes when I call him ""doctor."""